This article is the first in a series to help you identify any negative ‘Twisted Thoughts’ you may have that can really affect your levels of contentment and happiness. It will also suggest ways to ‘Untwist’ your thinking by putting the thoughts into perspective. This will help you feel more positive and ultimately happier.
We all have mental filters that stain the lens of our perception on the world. Our filters are caused by our beliefs and they can distort reality and can be very unhealthy and unhelpful and make your life much harder than it needs to be.
In his ‘Feeling Good Handbook’, David Burns (MD), has identified 10 common ‘twisted thoughts’ that prevent people from thinking about problems in a more positive and realistic way.
The first one is:
All-or-nothing thinking – this is where you see things in black-or-white categories (there are no shades of gray). If a situation falls short of perfect, you see it as a total failure. For example, you start a diet and you’re doing well for a week but then you give in to your craving for chocolate. You eat a chocolate bar and then think to yourself: “Oh no, I just failed my diet, I might as well give up on the whole idea”.
This makes you feel like a failure and you feel so down in the dumps that you want to eat even more chocolate.
A much more helpful way of thinking would be think to yourself “oh well, it would have been better if I hadn’t done that, but it’s done now, so I’ll just get back to my diet tomorrow morning”.